Growing Pains

The past couple of months have been quite difficult for me. Besides the chaos going on in the world with Corona virus (COVID-19), it felt like my world was a chaotic mess too. Can anyone relate?

I was struggling with health issues, relationship issues, work issues, family issues, and financial issues and on top of that I was locked out of my website.

2020 was just not going the way I hoped it would. 2020 just doesn’t seem to be going the way anyone expected. According to the meme I saw circulating “Can we unplug 2020, wait ten seconds and plug it back in?”

Truthfully, there were some dark days, some days when I just wanted to give up or run away, some days when I was just so confused, some days when I really questioned God.

The questions filled my mind, “God why am I struggling with these physical and mental health issues again? Why are these negative cycles repeating in my life? Why did I become a doctor? Can I really manage this stress for the rest of my life? Am I doing life the right way? Why are you so quiet God?” 

What are some of the questions you’ve had recently?

The song “My World Needs You” by Kirk Franklin became my heart’s cry…

“Show me your face; fill up this space, my world needs you right now, my world needs you right now.

I can’t escape being afraid, fill me with you right now, my world needs you right now.

Power fall down, bring with it a sound that points us to you right now, erase substitutes right now.

Fix what I see and God please fix me, let us see you right now, my world needs you right now.”

And then God spoke in such a unique and special way…

Story Time! (pull up a chair, get a cup of tea, relax and let’s talk)

So last year November I planted four sunflower seeds in an attempt to try out gardening for the first time. As I embarked on a new season in life I thought it would be symbolic and encouraging to watch these flowers grow as I grew in life.

All four seeds sprouted out seedlings pretty quickly but two seemed to be growing faster than the others.

By the end of December I was having issues with some pests and also noticed that the salty sea air (because I live five minutes away from the beach) seemed to be drying out the leaves and the flowers that were struggling to bloom.

Unfortunately, despite my efforts and my father’s efforts (who lovingly assisted me), one of the plants completely dried up and died.

By the end of January two flowers bloomed but shortly after withered and died…

However, there was one lone survivor. The sunflower plant which seemed to be growing the slowest ended up surprising us the most (N.B. there is a life lesson here).

We made sure to keep it in a location less affected by the salty sea air and sprayed it often to avoid pests. A beautiful sunflower bloomed by the beginning of February…

Unfortunately, it still withered and died (I believe the environment was just not ideal for this type of sunflower to thrive at its best, N.B. there is another life lesson here).

Alas, this time my father had a interesting idea to cut off the flower at the base of it’s stem and leave the rest of the plant.

I was so busy and stressed with life that I forgot about it, but one day at the beginning of March, my father stopped me and asked “Have you looked at the sunflower lately?”

To my pleasant surprise there were five budding sunflowers growing from the one plant…

God immediately brought to memory the scripture in John 15:2 which says, “He cuts off every branch of mine that doesn’t produce fruit and prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more.”

God showed me, that is what He is doing with me in this season. That is what He wants to do with all of His children.

The cutting away and pruning is a difficult and painful process but He uses the trials and tribulations of life to remove those things in us that don’t please Him.

He is removing people, situations, character flaws, negative belief systems and unhealthy habits from our lives. He is healing wounds that were never mended…

So that He can produce the fruit He created us to, in abundance! So that He can take us to the next level and new dimension in Him! So that we can truly bloom and grow where He has planted us and fulfill His God given purpose in us!

It has definitely been and continues to be a difficult and painful growing period but I believe the “growing pains” will be worth it in the end.

I don’t like pain, most people don’t, but just like the muscle pains we feel after an intense workout, some pain is good and necessary for growth.

I want to encourage you today (as I encourage myself), to let God work on you.  Let Him shape and mold you into the man or woman He created you to be.

I want to encourage you to remain in Him and He will produce the fruit that He needs to in you. Remain in His love, joy, peace, truth, faithfulness, and Word. Take time to rest and reflect in Him.

Be patient with Him and be patient with yourself. You are a work in progress. Trust Your Heavenly Father with your life. He only wants the very best for you.

Yours truly,

Dr Esther J Trotman (M.B.B.S.)

P.S. Please read all of John 15 when you get the time. Also, please keep safe and practice good hygiene during these times and pray for those who have been affected by COVID-19. God bless you.